Gemstone Engagement Ring Regret: Real Women on What They’d Do Differently
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Gemstone Engagement Ring Regret: Real Women on What They’d Do Differently

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Last year we posted what we thought would be a nice, friendly, educational article that just might save a few people some headaches and heartache.

The topic:

Lots of gemstones are really, really beautiful and unique and magical looking and cool, but very few are durable enough to be banged against stuff every day for the rest of your life.

To the majority of readers, though, this was a thinly veiled attempt at pushing pro-diamond propaganda. Or as one commenter succinctly put it, “Brought to you by the diamond industry.”

So don’t take it from us, take it from real women who reached out to us after we published the article:




“My ring is an opal. I don’t wear it when I’m working or playing outside. I think you can make it work but you have to research and educate yourself on opal care and maintenance. My permanent engagement ring will unfortunately have to be something a lot tougher, for reasons mentioned in other comments on this post.”
– Bria

“I realized when I had a gemstone engagement ring that there’s a reason they’re usually diamonds. Diamonds don’t scratch or break like other stones. I wish the diamond industry wasn’t so corrupt and bent on selling on other points. Longevity should be the focus.”
– Rhiannon

“I used to sell jewelry, I don’t believe diamonds are the only choice but several stones like opal and pearl should only be used if they are saved as special occasion rings because they are so soft. In my experience, if they are worn daily most people break them within a year, which is so sad for such a sentimental piece of jewelry.”
– Meagan

“I have an amethyst that is so scratched that it’s in desperate need of being recut. That’s after wearing it off and on as a wedding ring for several years. It’s beautiful, but I agree that it’s not an everyday stone.”
– Suzan

“I love opals (and have an opal engagement ring). They are CRAZY soft and I wouldn’t have asked for it if my ring was something I had to wear daily. I actually rarely wear my engagement ring.”
– Marie

“My engagement ring is a family ring of diamond and pearl. I knew it was delicate, but I rarely get to wear it because I don’t want to ruin it. I plan on having it remade someday with something harder so I can wear my ring daily.”
– Martha




If you’re dead set on a colored stone, we recommend colored diamonds, rough diamonds, sapphires (they come in MANY colors), rubies, morganites, and emeralds.

If you’re interested in gemstones because you want an ethical conflict free stone, check out lab created diamonds, moissanite, gemstones sourced in the U.S. and Canada, and lab grown gemstones

And it’s not because we don’t like those other gemstones — I myself have been known to wear turquoise and pearls, and an ill-fated moonstone engagement ring that cracked, but that’s for another blog — it’s because we like making engagement rings that don’t break and those gemstones are too soft to work with. There’s actually science that proves this.

Is there a gemstone you like that we’ve left out? Have advice about your own gemstone ring? Leave it in the comments!

Interested in making your own gemstone ring? Book a design meeting with us.

About Sarah Kiley

Sarah Kiley is Abby Spark Jewelry’s Marketing and SEO Manager.